My religion not real.......hmmmm well poo poo to you.

I have been working through the elements now for the past 9 months of my bardic training and last night was a ritual that united all the individual blessings I had done in the previous months. 

The ritual took me a record breaking 20 minutes haha. I know there are people out there who are gonna say it should have taken an hour or more and those that will say that I obviously did it wrong and should have taken more time over it..............well poo poo to you. I realised during the meditation at the end that the ritual was only the beginning and that it didn't matter how long it took me to do the actual ritual. The real point of the exercise is to give me something to live, that it's not the 5 minute meditation that is important but infact the realisation that I need to take what I have learned during the ritual and apply it to more than just this 20 minutes but the rest of my life. To truly live with the elements in my body mind and spirit and remember the balance that comes from the unity of all things. 

That balance is what gives me faith and strength, when I feel balanced I really truly feel the Magick all around me, the connection to the fae and the spirits of the land. It is an empowering feeling that makes me wonder how far I could go. I feel like nothing could stand in my way. 

The ritual yesterday came after a bout of bad news and shitty happenings, for example having a car is just not as much fun as people lead you to believe hahahaha. But anyway, life has been a challenge and I found myself feeling cut off and disconnected from the truth of my own power. The elements of the world seemed a far cry from the balance I had spent the last 9 months trying to achieve. But then something happened and I made a conscious decision to change my circumstances and stop worrying about what I couldn't change. Instead I decided to resort to my faith, my belief in Magick and my connection to the spirits. 

To my great relief my connection had remained strong and with the quietest of calls the spirits answered, I  was reminded of my old habits of drawing symbols on things to cheer myself up. I remembered a sigil that I created when I was but a wee lamb hahaha. It wasn't 10 minutes before I had a pen and I was drawing the symbol on the back of my hand hahaha. It made me feel safe and strong again.

The symbol was one I had always loved to draw, a pentagram with 5 orbs that sat between each point to represent the elements. The pentagram represented me and the orbs represented my connection to the elementals and the protection they offered me. It is a symbol that always makes me feel invincible, like it could do anything. It isn't much really is it? Just a symbol. 

But what it means to me is more than just a star and a few blobs. It's my seal, my security blanket, my spiritual mark of power and my personal rune. It is something that holds me to the beliefs that I cherish and the memory of it keeps me from forgetting how I came to use it to protect myself in the past when things would go wrong. The elements are with me now and they have always and will always be with me. From now until forever and back again.