Walking in the dark

It's been a big subject lately for me, the use of dark energy. A few of my friends have experience in that field however I am a lot less experienced. But last night I was walking home at 10 at night and I began to think about it.
What is dark energy, where does it come from?? I understand light energy and have an idea of where it comes from and what it it consists of but dark is different, maybe opposite. It made me think of something I saw on a science documentary about dark matter and dark energy and I thought why don't I try and pull that to me while I walk home (in the dark.......on my own haha).

Now how the hell do I do that? I was thinking to my self as I began the 2 mile stroll. First I need to identify the energy I am looking for, then I need to learn what it feels like before I can draw it in and then direct it through intention. So this was the tricky bit. How do you see something like dark energy? According to the science it does not interact with light at all and is unhindered by mater, I think that has something to do with dark energy being part of everything as light energy is.

I let my mind empty as I walked alone in the dark. I tried to just view the world in darkness and see with my heart like a sonar that could show my eyes what was really there, I watched as the cars whizzed past and left ripples in the dark energy all around. It was as if there was an inky mist in everything that was disturbed when you moved through it. I saw colours as the energy reset to how it was after being disturbed. I thought to myself "Right!!" so now I know what you look like, what do you feel like??

I began to mentally tug at the image in my mind and pull at the energy around me. It was hard. At first I felt the lights of the people and things around me then it expanded to the light of distant objects then the stars. I had spent years programming my senses to feel the light in things, the energy that I was so familiar with was hard to ignore but then I was walking through a dark alley of bushes and felt it.

Cold so very very cold, but not in a physical way but like something that is just silent and still. I began to tug at it and it began to move and settle around me on my aura ( I had set up some protection so I wouldn't invite any nasties in haha.) It had made no difference to the area around me as it moved silently through matter and unhindered by light. Dark energy was out there and it was in abundance. I pulled and pulled until it was thick around me and basked in its flow for a while. There was a feeling of excitement and awe as I knew what I was doing was awesome and new but it was also humbling, there was a feeling of appreciation for this new power and strength that I had found. I was aware of a different way.

I slowly began to release my grip on the energy after feeling it for a while and becoming familiar. It reminded me of my beloved fair folk who live in 2 worlds. They relish the dark and understand it just as much as they understand the light. Some more than others. I thought about how the world we live on is multi dimensional and how if we just explored carefully we would be able to find out so much more about ourselves and the beings that are out there.
I bet some of you are thinking Ohhhhhh you have to  be careful, so here it is. Yes be careful but no.....don't be afraid or over cautious. No one ever explored anywhere without having some element of danger follow them, NO ONE. So go and explore different energy and claim it for your self, work with it as your own power source and become a master in your own right. Just don't get carried away and be safe.

Power can run away with all of us, I only touched a new source of it yesterday and I'm still buzzing. Blessed Be guys and take it easy.

A long ole day.

Hey everyone, it's been a long old day and I have done lots and lots. Today was my enrolment at college and well it was a bit of organised (if you could call what I saw organised) chaos. After that I visited my Grandma, had dinner and chatted until dark. All round I had a good day and started to feel very good about the way the world is moving again (well my little world anyway).

Magick has been the furthest thing from my mind lately, or so I thought. Some times it just happens without you knowing or without you trying might be a better way of putting it. The enrolment went well today and I had been gearing up to it for weeks if not months so today when it finally happened I was ready. The forms were sorted in no time and my exam certificates were sorted. My picture for my ID was a good one for once. Then I had to pay my tuition, which went well until the card machine didn't accept my pin. I thought to myself "NO way am I going to let this stop me". The woman who was helping process my payment then mentioned I could do it on line with her there and then but that earlier in the day this service hadn't been working. So I said do it, I crossed my arms, fingers, toes and my legs and just asked everything around me in the ether and otherwise to MAKE IT WORK!!!!!!!

The woman was shocked and yelped a "YEY" as the payment went through first time with no hassle and no repeating of the details in the system or anything at all annoying haha. I was so happy to be leaving knowing that now it was done and I wasn't waiting for it all to start any more. I wonder if crossing everything helped?

I went to visit my Grandma and we took the dog for a walk. It was in the park while I was picking blackberries that I made my offering to spirit and said thank you. With my bag of potions and oils on my hip I took out the herb offering I use all the time and sprinkled it saying thanks to all the spirits that have helped me this past little while and asked them to accept the offering. It must have worked, the pie we had later on was just lush.

Ok so not pie but it was the only picture I had with pastry in it haha.

I'm so happy that the seeds I planted months ago have started to sprout and grow, Now all I need to do is nurture and protect what I have worked for so that it may bear fruit. Blessed Be and thank you for reading, It has supported me in ways that I may never be able to express.

It's a little bit funny.

This feeling inside haha. I don't know really but that's the one we struggle with isn't it. LOVE!! The one that eludes us for such a time, that makes our hearts ache, our limbs weak and leave our bodies crushed. The one that we spend the most time ignoring and the one that can solve so many problems but is pushed aside by fear.

I wonder why it is so complicated? Falling in love was easy for me. I arranged to meet up with this beautiful guy and when I saw him for the first time it was like I feel for him now. I know his heart and he knows mine and that's why this past five years have felt like five minutes. I can say to people it was love at first sight and mean it.

But that's not the only love there is. There is the love of your family and your siblings. Your parents and your pets. There is of course the love you feel for your friends and companions too. But I'm sure it doesn't stop there. I happen to be one of those annoying people that tells everyone that he loves them and what is really weird is that I do. I love people.........a lot of people and all though I know that makes me sound like an utter slut haha. I don't care.

I feel love for the people around me because it helps. It helps to solve our problems, it helps to secure friends, it even helps for me to let people leave my life and hurt me. I let love in as often as I can and I let love leave me because I know that by being open to its power that I will never feel the sting off loss for long at all before love from another source fills the space and heals the wound. Love is something that is inherent in each of us so why don't all of us love more freely with compassion and understanding. Let things move in love and pass with love so that love will return.

Blessed Be you lovely people. LOVE YOU!!!!!

P.S I will never say love so much in a post ever again hahahaha promise :oD

Anger is my choice of bitter.

What a way to WANT to be, can't understand it myself. Its got to be hard for some of us if not all of us when the right thing happens to make us feel very angry. But why would you want to stay in that moment? I have known people that have let these moments last for days before finally letting it fizzle out and be of no consequence.

How we move that energy on is different for each of us. Some of us erupt over the smallest of things and others of us have longer fuses that goes off with (maybe) more of a bang. But how do you use this power in a way that does not cause harm and in a way that moves you in the right direction?? How do we make anger and frustration in to focus and progression??

Or let the goddess knock them the **** out haha

I can only use my own experiences to guide, so here goes. I have found that at times the need has been for me to express how I am feeling and you may think that this is a negative thing, but in the right situation the right thing to do is to bare your teeth and defend your self with the energy of the situation. So yes use this energy (anger,frustration) to give your words power and to protect yourself without causing harm.

Another technique I have used is to remove myself from the situation and remove the energy of the event from my field and put it somewhere that it can be better dealt with. Like the earth or one I like more is running water. Energy is effectively potential movement, so passing that on to a body of water seems (to me) more in tune as water is in a constant state of motion anyway.

Lastly is to transmute the energy of a situation in myself and then pass it back to help resolve the problem. I'm not saying this is easy and I'm not saying it works perfectly every time, emotions have a way of getting at your core sometimes and making it hard to much of anything. But at least with this knowledge then maybe some issues can be dealt with before they get too big for you to handle. I know there are other methods out there to control your own energy and not let emotions rule your actions but these are just examples I have experience with.

Blessed Be

Sexual strength is for pussies

I would like to say that I am confident and sure about all the things I feel to do with myself, but the reality is that I'm not. I have struggled to define what makes me FEEL the way I do for a long long time and I have been fighting what has felt like a loosing battle for what feels like almost forever.

My sexuality has led me in to some very unfamiliar territory and because it's social acceptance is still rather young I am finding it hard to express how I feel openly. I could be a big camp guy with big camp ideas and big camp friends but I'm not. Yes I am eccentric and hyperactive but I am not camp, but that means I'm not butch and burly either, I'm just me and I am stuck trying to figure out how to express that feeling so that I don't have to bottle it up hoping not to get to the point where it bursts out and puts me in a bad situation.

So I have decided to join a belly dance class, not because I want to tone up (even though that is going to be a nice bonus haha), not because I want to learn to dance either but because belly dance gives me the opportunity to express my sexual feminine energy in a safe and powerful way and it helps me to alter how I feel about myself. The dancing connects me to the divine feminine that is in me (and everyone else) and helps it to come out. I mean yes I found that I felt silly and uncomfortable during the lesson but after about half an hour I was at ease completely and felt connected to something that I rarely get in touch with.

Frank Farinaro is superb at what he does.

In my life I have not really had female roll models nor have I had much feminine exposure due to my sexuality (obviously haha) which has made me feel a tad well...... unbalanced, that I need to connect to what I have been missing. The dance does this in a way that I didn't know it could, it connects me to the Goddess. That part of everything that I have not had much to do with, that I have missed out on and that I have avoided. I want to have that part of me strengthened and renewed so that I can feel it. 

One day I will dance and it will be me dancing for the Goddess and showing her my strength, that I can be strong and I can be balanced.

Feeling the vibes

I'm going to try and describe how I felt the other night.

I was invited to a friends house to help with an alter/shrine in the back garden that she had created. A place dedicated to the practice of magick outdoors, me and my friends were asked to share a ceremony with a Shaman friend of ours and then feel free to add whatever magick we wanted to the sacred space. 

Another friend of ours communed with the elements and I think she invoked deity and as I watched the space I had a vision of a big black cauldron filled to the brim with magick of many colours. All swirling around and moving in sync with each other. Not mixing but working together to create something powerful. I saw how each person was adding a different group of magickal ingredients to the mix and making it stronger and stronger.

Next it was my turn, so I took my fae wand and gestured a spell of protection over the sight and then got to my knees and thought to myself that I would invoke the fae and ask them to watch over this place. I was going to ask if they would please offer their strengths to this place and they answered. With such a flood of power they answered. Before I had said the words my body shivered and I felt them all around me.

Their presence was immense as they swarmed around to answer my call, a few of them agreed to my request and seemed almost pleased that they were being asked to watch over the place. As I knelt there on the spot I felt their energy strong and multicoloured until my Shaman friend stood behind me and they flew to a safe distance. We were disturbed and even though I had finished and the magick was in place I couldn't help but feel the wrench as their power left my field. It was an amazing sensation and just helped to remind me of who they are and how they feel. It felt so real and so natural to me.

I'm not sure how exactly to explain how I felt at each moment that night. I just know that It was right for me. I suppose this is just me sharing an experience. Blessed Be.

Mirror magick

How often have you done something and felt that you were right in every aspect?...............Go on........................... Think about it and then ask yourself. How many times afterword have you re-evaluated it and thought. "Why the hell did I do that??"

Sometimes we find ourselves feeling very confident and we can do so much with that confidence that at times we can be oblivious to the actual effects of our actions.
I was reminded lately of how people can take confidence and turn it in to arrogance, which is difficult to say because you run the risk of saying you are better than them yourself which can then in turn make you rather arrogant (Ooo complicated aye haha). However, I think arrogance comes from the belief that you can't get things wrong sometimes.

What if that arrogance was cemented by what you believed in, be it Christian, Muslim, Pagan or Druid. How would your beliefs influence your actions and responses to other people if you deemed them inferior or miss led.

So here it is then, look in the mirror and tell yourself you have the power to do what ever you want. That you are divinely blessed. That you can do no wrong. But for the love of god please include that you will be humble and compassionate. That you will be tolerant and understanding.

Mirror magick has the potential to change your life if you take the time to look at who is staring back at you, just be careful not to feel that you don't really know the person on the other side. We aren't always who we think we are but we do have the power to change it. Break the model and keep moving forward :o)